Comprehending Accountants - Take One
Two accountancy students were walking across campus when one said,
“Where did you get such a great bike?” The second accountant replied,
” Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a
beautiful woman rode up on this bike.
She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ” Take
what you want. ”
The first accountant nodded approvingly,
” Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn’t fit. ”
Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
A woman went to her doctor. The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, ‘I’ve some bad news. You have cancer, and you’d best put your affairs in order.’
The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and
walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting.
(more…)
A man calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there’s a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
Bob works hard at the office but spends two nights each week bowling, and plays golf every Saturday.
His wife thinks he’s pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
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